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What's Out of Control

from God Knows What by Conductors

/

lyrics

“Who will wear my ring?”
He said, “Whom shall I wed?”
Laughing, she says, “it’s only up to him.
Watching him it’s clear to me
the power of self-deceit.”
She appears to him mirthfully.
Unfortunately not mercifully.
Well she’s no fruitful prospect.
He thinks, “Please don’t suspect, don’t expect.”
She says, “You shouldn’t worry so”
She’s no angel but how does she know?
“You’ve got to make your own fate,”
she says, “but for you it may be too late.”
She grins. He wonders “Is she it?
Has she thought of having kids?”
O she’s not interested,
but she wouldn’t say it’s been determined.
There’s no sole control
over the fulfillment of the soul.

If your idle hands are the devil’s tools
then you were never any good.

You need to know what you control
not only what you’re told.

There’s only one real you,
and it’s no real mystery.

Take a look at what you do -
there’s your big discovery.

No deeper self than that,
nothing hidden actually.

If you try to stay busy so you don’t sin,
you only avoid the trouble you’re in.

Can’t you be alone in your room
without distraction?

Can’t you turn away from temptation
without distraction?

Be aware of your self
and what’s out of control.

I know I have some control.
I know I’m responsible.

But how horrible it would be,
if even our ideas were not free.

If our minds were a plaything,
not free in word or deed.

But I don’t see
how I could be deceived.

I don’t know what it means for freedom to be imaginary.

Weddings aren’t meant to be endings
and so far his has not come.
A beginning off in the distance
makes an ending seem quite tame.
He still remembers those
women who could have been
the bride for whom he still waits.
He has become 
more accustomed to the pain of love 
than to the joy.
Still his life is guided by 
one desperate hope
made more powerful by
it’s unlikelihood.
It’s so common but so particular.
Do we control our hope?
It may be instilled in us
but still we feel we can fulfill
out of our sheer free will.
Only total control
could answer every hope.

credits

from God Knows What, released May 19, 2014

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Conductors Chicago, Illinois

"Mona tried to tell me
To stay away from the train line
She said that all the railroad men
Just drink up your blood like wine
An’ I said, 'Oh, I didn’t know that
But then again, there’s only one I’ve met
An’ he just smoked my eyelids
An’ punched my cigarette' " ... more

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